Unwilling to Be Yours

It’s QueerBlogWed, a day on which to share and post something queer. Tales of the Navel/The Shadows is this in more ways than one.

Today Peter picks up where he left off on Monday in Unwilling to Be Yours, the second prelude to my unpublished novels inspired by Tarot card imagery.


“I’m guessing the Door you’re talking about is a portal to another world?” This was more magic than I cared to deal with. “Your Damian was trying to create one?”

“He didn’t just try,” Christopher said. His voice was very soft, as he gazed at the painting. “He succeeded.”

I stared at him. He nodded in the direction of the painting.

“That thing is a Door?” The words came out all breathless and scared. “Damian created a Door in your shop?”

I was sure whether I was terrified or outraged. What Damian had done was beyond rude, or inconsiderate. “This sounds like a dangerous disregard for you and yours.”

“I know,” Gabrielle said with a sigh. The anger seemed to run out of her at the sight of mine. “I’m afraid Damian didn’t have very much respect for me, or the Navel.”

I half expected an angry retort from Christopher at this criticism of his precious Damian.

To my surprise, he didn’t say anything. His eyes dropped to his feet, avoiding Gabrielle’s.

Talk about a bad employee. I sympathized with ‘Brie and Christopher, yet all the while a malicious part of me hissed in satisfaction. My rival was a prick. As if I hadn’t suspected as much.


Unwilling to Be Yours

It’s Me Me Monday! A day to promote, celebrate, and strut your Me-ness!

Only no one in the Navel feels much like celebrating right now. Gabrielle and Christopher both try to answer Peter’s question from Saturday. A impossible task, since they’re not sure of the answer themselves.


There was a moment of utter silence.

Gabrielle gazed at Christopher with an almost childlike helplessness.

I didn’t like seeing my cheerful, boisterous employer like this.

However, I liked the look on Christopher’s face even less.

His eyes were wide, moist, and frighteningly blank. He wasn’t seeing Gabrielle, nor anything else which I could.

“I don’t know.” The heartbroken defeat in his voice made me want to cry. “Perhaps he channeled his wish into the painting. He was trying to create a Door to the Shadow Forest.”

“The Shadow Forest?” I’d heard such titles before for various, sinister woodlands, trying to be scary and impressive.

Sometimes they truly were.

“What’s that?” I was liking Damian less and less for trying to open a Door to this place.

Especially in the middle of ‘Brie’s place.

“What lies beyond the Door. A place most only visit in their dreams. Anything you can imagine.” Gabrielle shrugged, as if none of these things impressed her much. “Take your pick.”

“It’s anything that lies on the other side of a Door,” Christopher frowned, a wrinkle appearing between slender eyebrows. “It’s where fantasy is born. I’m surprised you haven’t heard of it.”

“Perhaps I have,” I said, choosing my words with care. “I didn’t call it the Shadow Forest, though.”

I wasn’t going to say what I did call it. Names have power.


To Be Continued Wednesday, QueerBlogWed.

Unwilling to Be Yours is the second prelude to my unpublished book, Stealing Myself From Shadows.

The first prelude was Waiting for Rebirth.

The third will be Be My Valentine…Snack.

Stealing Myself From Shadows is the first book in my Tales of the Navel/The Shadow Forest series. It’s an ambient fantasy series of self discovery, based off Tarot card imagery.

Stealing Myself From Shadows is currently under revision, along with The Hand and the Eye of the Tower (Book 2) and A Godling for Your Thoughts? (Book 3)


Unwilling to Be Yours

Welcome to Rainbow Snippets!

Every Saturday, six sentences of LGBTQ+ fiction is posted and shared. It can be yours. It can be someone else’s. It just needs to be LGBTQ+.

To read a wide of variety of samples from LGBTQ+ stories, go to


Mine is from Unwilling to Be Yours, the second prelude I’m posting online to my novel, Stealing Myself From Shadows. (currently under revision).

It’s the first book in an ambient fantasy series I’m writing inspired by Tarot card imagery known as Tales of the Navel/The Shadow Forest.

I’ve got drafts on Book 2 (The Hand and the Eye of the Tower) and Book 3 (A Godling for Your Thoughts?) which I’m also working on.

Unwilling to Be Yours picks up right where it left off on Wednesday (QueerBlogWed).

‘Brie had just tried to pit her will against ‘Waiting for Rebirth’, the painting which swallowed Damian in the previous prelude. Alas, its hold on him is too strong.

Peter is still trying to figure out what’s going on. 🙂


I had no right to interrupt such an intimate moment, even if I was there. Alas, my mouth has a will of its own.

“What wish?” I asked before I could think better of it. “How could a painting steal Damian away?”

There was a moment of utter silence.

Dayel to Tayel

I’m making a big change in my Tales of the Navel/The Shadow Forest series to the twins’s names.

I’ve talked about it at cauldronkeeper.livejournal.com.

The twins talked about it at inspirationcauldron.blogspot.com.

They’re still talking about it…

Danyel: Tayel, Tayel, I’m still getting used to your new name…what? Where are we?

Tayel: The other Cauldron. The one unbound by blocks, able to spread freely through social media.

Danyel: Isn’t this where Christopher is?

Tayel: We’re visiting in the spaces between his prelude.  (glances around) We haven’t visited this Cauldron very often. More often we’re in the forbidden spaces.

Danyel: Even though we’re part of the same universe, multi-universe as Christopher.  I’m not sure what we’d call Tales of the Navel/The Shadow Forest. Dayel…I mean, Tayel! Argh, I’m still not used to your name.

Tayel: Look up the bright side, shining through the darkness of confusion, which will lessen.

Danyel: What confusion? I’ve never confused the two of us! It’s our readers which were confused.

Tayel: Exactly. You’re completely different than me. Our names should reflect our uniqueness.

Danyel: We’re not that different. We look exactly the same, except you’ve got that silver light which appears in your eyes whenever you spot something.

Tayel: An nimbus appears around your hand whenever you reshape the world around you.

Danyel: Aren’t we giving away spoilers? Shouldn’t we wait until The Hand and the Eye of the Tower is published before we start talking about what we can do?

Tayel: Waiting until Stealing Myself From Shadows is publishing, while Christopher draws every admiring eye to himself is tedious. We must prove we have as much right to exist as he did.

Danyel: I didn’t realize we were competing with Christopher for existence.

Tayel: We compete with many imaginary creatures, including ourselves.

Danyel: Are we competing with each other?

Tayel: I’d never compete with you. Nor would I allow you to surrender your own name to the creatrix. (Tayel pauses to give me an intimidating look.)

(I shiver a bit. He might be an imaginary slip of a boy with a deceptively frail appearance, but Tayel can be quite scary when he wishes to. )

Danyel: It’s curious. We do compete against each other at times, but we’re not really rivals. We’re too different.

Tayel: True. Our existences don’t threaten each other’s.

Danyel: We both love stories, flower, share the same color system for deciding about the character of an individual-

Tayel: Red for passion. Brown for the mundane. Green for life and love, but blue for endless depths of feeling-

Danyel: -green is the very essence of all things living, growing, and vibrant-

Tayel:- a person with a touch of blue has a sensitivity you cannot cultivate if you simply nourish what is green within you.

Danyel: We’re never going to agree on this. You prefer blue, while my favorite is green.

Tayel: Just one more eccentricity on your part. Such as your love for that cursed tower. Not to mention your unhealthy interest in people.

Danyel: (blushing) I don’t love the tower. Not…exactly. Also my interest in people isn’t unhealthy! Aren’t you a little bit curious about what people are like?

Tayel: No.

Danyel: You aren’t lonely with just Map, Leiwell, and me for company?

Tayel: No. It’s difficult enough with the three of you.

Danyel: What do you mean?

Tayel: You trust our older brother completely. I find him dangerously fragile.

Danyel: How can you say Leiwell is fragile? He looks after all of us!

Tayel: It’s too heavy a burden.

Danyel: I wish you wouldn’t speak in riddles.

Tayel: (glancing around): Traces of Christopher and Damian linger here, dripping from this Cauldron. Direct answers are dangerous.

Danyel: Speaking of danger, I still think you’re dangerously close to spoilers.

Tayel: Not really. There’s little to spoil…yet.

Danyel: Listen to you, hinting at secrets I know nothing at once more. Like your name change, it makes me feel like you’re drifting away from me.

Tayel: You’re catching a glimpse of my nightmares and waking fears of you not simply drifting away. Someone or something takes you from me.

Danyel: You don’t need to worry about that! I’ll never leave you…Tayel.

Tayel: (sighs) That’s a dangerous habit of yours.

Danyel: What is?

Tayel: Making promises you mean with your whole heart that you’ll never be able to keep.

Danyel: You don’t believe me? I’ll keep it! (balls a hand into a fist) Just watch me!

Tayel: (smiling sadly) Always.



Unwilling to Be Yours

It’s #QueerBlogWed, a day to share something queer. The Navel and its denizens count as that in the old fashioned sense as well as the modern. 🙂

Last Monday, Peter found out that Damian is responsible for the painting he finds so disturbing. We pick up where he left off in the next part of Unwilling to Be Yours…

“Didn’t he want anyone to know he was the artist?” Modesty was not a quality I’d associate with my absent rival. Even though I’d never met Damian, I was certain he possessed none.

“What?” Christopher asked, looking a little surprised. “There should be a card, with the title, ‘Waiting for Rebirth’ on it, along with Damian’s name.”

“I took the card down,” Gabrielle confessed. She stared at the painting at the painting in a decidedly unfriendly fashion.

I felt a little better about my own discomfort around it.

“I wanted to remove the painting itself, but Christopher convinced me not to.” ‘Brie crossed her arms and jutted out her chest, revealing less cleavage than I’d expected. “I removed the card, instead.”

“Why?” Christopher turned with a shocked fury on his mother. “Why try to hide the fact that Damian painted it?”

“In an attempt to sever, or at least shake the connection between Damian and that painting. To force that thing to release him.” Gabrielle kept her attention fixed on the patches of silvery white on the canvas.

Something was stirring in the Navel. The power I’d sensed gliding around was raising its head, like a cobra rearing to strike.

“This is the manifestation of a wish that stole Damian away.” Gabrielle’s eyes glittered.

The air tingled. I could feel the power gathering like a wave, rising against the painting.

It struck something. I shuddered with the impact of an invisible force. It dashed the power into something which spread and diffused harmlessly across the floor.

Gabrielle slumped, her arms falling slack at her sides.

“It appeared that wish is too powerful for me to overcome.” She turned, eyes filled with unshed tears toward Christopher. “Sometimes, it feels like it took you, too.”

Christopher dropped his own liquid gaze to the floor, lips trembling with words unspoken.

Unwilling to Be Yours

It’s Me Me Monday! A day to strut, promote, and celebrate your Me-ness!

Only for Christopher, it’s all about Him, Him, Him, Alas, for Peter, it’s not him. It’s still Damian.

Picking up where the boys left off on Saturday (during Rainbow Snippets) in Unwilling to Be Yours…


“You’re hurting me.” My voice came out in a childish murmur. I wasn’t sure why. Those small fingers weren’t doing that much damage.

Christopher looked down at his hand, blinking at his fingers in confusion.

“I’m sorry,” he said, dropping his arm as if it burned him. “Please tell me. It’s very important. Do the objects glow?”

“I’m not sure,” I said with complete honesty.

What I remembered was the menace each of those objects held. It was like the picture was threatening me.

“They were sharp and distinct.” I chose each word with care, considering it carefully. “I’m not sure if they glowed.”

“I see,” Christopher said. His head dropped, his bangs falling forward to cover his eyes. His shoulders slumped. “We still don’t know, if it’s him.”

The way he said ‘him’ was reverential. There was only one ‘him’ Christopher could be talking about.

“Damian,” I said. I looked from Gabrielle to Christopher. “He’s the one who painted that picture, isn’t he?”

There hadn’t been any small card, naming the painting or the artist. This was just one of many strange things about it.

Unwilling to Be Yours

Welcome to Rainbow Snippets! Every Saturday, six sentences of LGBTQ+ fiction is posted and shared. It can be your own. It can be someone else’s. It just needs to be LGBTQ+.

To read a wide variety of samples of LGBTQ+ samples, go here https://www.facebook.com/groups/RainbowSnippets/?ref=group_header

Peter picks up where he left off on Wednesday (#QueerBlogWed) in facing a crazed Christopher at the fact that he (Peter) saw something in the painting…

Can anyone guess now what painting this is? 🙂

Big clue, it played a major part in ‘Waiting for Rebirth’.  🙂


“Silvery white things.” I blurted out the truth before I could think better of it. “Skulls, turning knives, other menacing objects.”

“Silvery white,” Christopher murmured, savoring each word. “These silvery white things, do they glow with light?” His fingers dug a little deeper, reaching my skin.