Waiting for Rebirth

It’s QueerBlogWed! Time to blog about all things queer! ‘Waiting for Rebirth’ and its characters are this in every sense of the word. 🙂 Christopher picks up right where he left off with Damian on Monday, sharing this thoughts, his confusion, his inability to understand Hebe…or Gabrielle.

“Why does she keep coming back?” Damian demanded of Gabrielle. “Why does she take cup after cup?”

“She’s searching for something,” Gabrielle said. It was yet another morning. The two of them unpacked another set of cups. I hadn’t realized how many the Navel went through. “These goblets are her way of trying to find it.”

“Aren’t there simpler ways of finding something?” Damian had stared at the cup in the box. This one was a sallow green with a black shadow across it. Much less attractive than the last. “Why is she doing this?”

“Her reasons are her own, Damian,” Gabrielle had said with utter patience and a complete lack of curiousity. It maddened him. “It’s not our place to ask her.”

Not our place. The words echoed Duessa’s own question, mockingly. What exactly was Damian’s place?

Only when he looked at Christopher, looked into his eyes did he sense it. Something cool and colorful, like the skies which always distracted his creation, his model.

Why was everyone so happy with what they had, except for him? Why did Damian keep wanting more?

Waiting for Rebirth

It’s Me Me Monday! A day to strut, promote, and celebrate your Me-ness! Only Damian and ‘Brie aren’t celebrating. Not from what Christopher can see of them in Damian’s thoughts and memories…

“Well, another day at the Navel,” Damian quipped, not bothering to keep the sarcasm out of his voice. “What will it be today? Another metal chicken? Maybe one will appear in bone china with a green beak and blue feathers. “

“What a good idea!” Gabrielle grinned back at him. “Maybe you should paint and design one.”

“No one likes my painting or designs.” Damian turned to open a box. “Oh, look, another cup.” He lifted it and inspected it from every angle. “It looks like Hebe has broken another.”

“This means she’ll be needing another,” Gabrielle said. “Please go and unpack these.”

“Why?” Damian demanded. “Hebe will only break this one, like she broke all of the others.” He held it by the handle, dangling it over the floor. “Maybe I should just break it now, get it over with.”

“It won’t do you any good if you do,” Gabrielle said, shaking her head. “Not to mention it will hurt Hebe.”

“Why?” Damian demanded. “How exactly is coming in here, picking up cup after cup, going to help Hebe?”

“That’s for her to decide,” Gabrielle said, tapping a finger against the box. “We just provide the cups.”

“Don’t you get tired of simply providing the cups?” Damian demanded. “Because I am.” He crossed his arms, the cup still dangling from his finger.

“Be careful with that,” Gabrielle warned. “If you break it, there will be consequences.”

“I’d like to see them,” Damian retorted, but he carried the cup out to the shelf. He stared hard at the painted sides, the maiden dancing on the side of it. The design was striking, unique enough to catch Hebe’s eye. It wouldn’t last, though. None of her cups ever lasted, or satisifed her for long.

Waiting for Rebirth

Welcome to Rainbow Snippets! Every Saturday, six sentences of GLBTQ+ fiction is posted and shared. It can be your own. It can be someone else’s. It just needs to be GLBTQ+.

To read a wide variety of samples of GLBTQ+ fiction, go here https://www.facebook.com/groups/RainbowSnippets/?ref=group_header

Christopher and Damian will picking up right where they left off on Wednesday, with Damian sharing his memories with Christopher via touch. Or is Christopher feeding upon them?

Anger tingled, sizzling between ‘Brie and Damian. They’d held back, repressed it when I was around. It had waited, every morning to emerge. Every time I’d stepped out their door to enjoy my new existence, all the sights which awaited me on my walk.

“No,” I whispered, not wanting to see this. Not wanting to see the frustration glittering in Damian’s eyes when he’d turned to Gabrielle.

Waiting for Rebirth

It’s QueerBlogWed! A day to share all things queer on your blog. ‘Waiting for Rebirth’ is queer in both the old fashioned sense and the new. As is Christopher, its main character, who struggles to be a real person instead of a shadow, drinking what’s vital and pulsing in order to feel real.

“I promised ‘Brie I wouldn’t feed in the Navel,” I whispered. Oh, how his emotions swirled within me, confusing this new sense of self. “Please, Damian, don’t make me do this.”

“What about me?” Damian asked. He leaned forward, touched his forehead to mine. “Christopher, you have no idea how badly I need this. Let me show you what we’ve been hiding.”

Waiting for Rebirth

It’s Me Me Monday! A day to celebrate, strut, and revel in your Me-ness! Only it’s truly Damian/Christopher’s moment in the next part of ‘Waiting for Rebirth’. Here’s the moment they met through Damian’s eyes. It may not have been the first time…

Perhaps this was why Damian had picked up one of the skulls and headed outside. Not knowing why, he’d walked towards the garden.

“Christopher, I need you,” he’d said. Startled, I saw myself in his thoughts, a boy with flowers in his hair. A boy who was me, yet he wasn’t. “You have no idea how much I miss you right now.”

I gasped, but Damian held onto my hand. I felt his yearning, tugging at me, although I wasn’t yet me. He’d set the skull down upon the grassy path. I shuddered at the sight of it, trying to pull away, but it caught me. I was drawn to it, seeing the air ripple around it.

Damian had gasped at the Door opening right in front of him, but he’d stretched out his hand. He’d released his desire, his wish to the creature who drank it up, seizing his hand.

“You came back to me,” Damian whispered. “I don’t know how how you did it, but you returned. Only it was a completely new you, an innocent you.”

No, not innocent. I stared down at our interlocking hands and swallowed. I tried to pull free, but Damian wouldn’t let go.

Waiting for Rebirth

Welcome to Rainbow Snippets! Every Saturday, six sentences of GLBTQ+ fiction is posted and shared. It can be your own. It can be someone else’s. It just needs to be GLBTQ+ fiction.

To read a wide variety of samples from GLBTQ+ fiction, go to https://www.facebook.com/groups/RainbowSnippets/?ref=group_header

For mine, Damian is picking up where he left off on Wednesday, sharing his memories with Christopher. Or perhaps Christopher is feeding off his thoughts? It’s about ‘Brie and Damian, though…

He wasn’t sure when he started picking fights with ‘Brie. Always over small, inconsequential things.

“Why all the chickens?” he’d demanded. He’d stared at a metal rooster, which appeared to made out of melted spanners. It had opened its beak in a defiant caw, only to stand silent, trapped forever in immobility.

“Why not?” Gabrielle asked, flashing him a smile of careless brilliancy. It silenced him.

In the end, she’d always silenced him.

 

Waiting for Rebirth

It’s QueerBlogWed! This definitely applies to Christopher, Damian, and ‘Waiting for Rebirth’, so here they all are. It would apply to Duessa Ashelocke, too, although she’s also the representative of an establishment which Damian had hoped he’d left behind. Alas, escaping from an arachnocrat is not so easy, especially if she’s Duessa Ashelocke…

“Well, it’s good to see you, my dear, but I don’t think much of what you’ve done with your life.”

Damian had froze in terror at the sound of his aunt’s voice.

Duessa had stood in the shop, smiling down at him. Not bothering to open more than one pair of eyes.

He’d stared at her, feeling the store, its fragile sanctuary shrinking around him.

“Oh, don’t look at me like that. Did you really think you’d succeeded in defying me?” Duessa had laughed, a light, lady like titter, utterly different than Gabrielle’s. “I hope you enjoyed your moment of rebellion, my dear, but you didn’t think I’d truly let you go.”

“This is my Place of Power, Duessa.” Gabrielle had spoke, stepping out of the shadows to stand by his side.

Damian had shivered in anticipation. At last, she was going to fight for him, the mage he’d chosen to serve. The one who could teach him to stand up to his aunt.

“Damian is welcome to stay here for as long as he wishes.” Gabrielle had taken a few steps closer to look straight into Duessa’s eyes.

This would have been perfect, if only she hadn’t taken Duessa’s hand. Stroking it with a tenderness which completely excluded him.

“Remember our agreement.” His chosen mentor had said those words, while caressing his enemy’s fingers. “Damian has no place among the arachnocrats.”

“As if I could ever forget.” Duessa had raised a hand to brush one of Gabrielle’s locks of hair out of her face, almost tenderly. She’d opened a second pair of eyes, allowing them to rove with intimate disregard over the other woman. “I wonder if Damian has any place here, either, though?”

All it took was that one question to completely shake up any sense of belonging at the Navel.

 

Waiting for Rebirth

It’s Me Me Monday! A day to strut and celebrate one’s Me-ness. Alas, poor Damian doesn’t feel much like celebrating. Too much of his bitter disappointment in Gabrielle is coming to the surface in the next part of ‘Waiting for Rebirth’.

Only she hadn’t. She’d opened her Navel for business, only the shop didn’t exactly do business. It drew customers inside, looking for something they couldn’t quite name, but somehow needed.

“We’re on the edge of reality, where sentiments lost take form.” Gabrielle had turned around in her shop, resplendid in a hat covered with feathers, sea shells, and a smiley face tucked in the brim. “Every object claimed in the Navel is a soul becoming more whole..”

“Only a little,” Damian had retorted. “You could do much more in the Shadow Forest itself.”

“More is risky. Besides, the Door won’t open for me.” ‘Brie had uttered these words with careless ease that struck Damian like a stone hitting his chest. “There’s nothing I want there.”

Nothing she wanted. ‘Brie was quite content in her silly shop with her silly clothes, helping silly people. It didn’t matter that she could have been so much more. She didn’t care. She just squandered her power, pretending to be a shop keeper. All she ever did with her magic was hand out trinkets. Objects infused with bits of memory and character her customers didn’t know they’d lost.

“Why should I want more than I have?” A tiny wrinkle of frustration had appeared between Gabrielle’s slender golden eyebrows. Damian felt a certain vicious satisfaction to see this reflection of his own discontent in her face. “My shop helps people in little ways, every day.”

“It’s petty!” he’d snapped, trying to find the right words, the right expression for his discontent. “Is this what I left my life behind for?”

“What life?” Gabrielle had looked him straight in the eye. “You were going to be a marriage feast. No one wanted that for you, not even Duessa.”

“What?” Damian had stared at Gabrielle, his mentor, whom he’d defied his aunt to follow. “What are you saying?”

“Damian, your aunt knows you’re here.” Gabrielle had frowned at the expression on his face. “Did you really think she didn’t?”

“I thought I’d escaped from her.” Damian had ripped each word out of his throat, feeling like bits of himself were being torn. Maybe Gabrielle would find pieces of him in this shop, among all the other discarded emotions which were now dolls, crystals, or chicken statues.

He’d stared at the skulls on the shelf. He’d shaped them out of clay with his hands, pretending each one of them belonged to a boy who’d been a Marriage Feast. He’d named each of them after someone who was now a statue, beautiful and eternal in his wife’s garden. Only their essences were gone. They’d been drained on their marriage nights.

If only those skulls were real. If only he could bring them back. If only Duessa knew what he truly wanted. She never would have let him escape.

Waiting for Rebirth

Welcome to Rainbow Snippets! Every Saturday, six sentences of GLBTQ+ fiction is posted and shared. It can be your own. It can be someone else’s. It just needs to be GLBTQ+.

To read a wide variety of samples from GLBTQ+ stories, go here https://www.facebook.com/groups/RainbowSnippets/?ref=group_header

Damian picks up right where he left off on Wednesday in ‘Waiting for Rebirth’, prelude to my ‘Tales of the Navel/The Shadow Forest’ series. The first book, ‘Stealing Myself From Shadows’ is currently under revision for publication. This snippet is actually seven sentences long, forgive me…(bows)

 

“Can’t you feel it?” ‘Brie had asked, sniffing the air around her. “All of the lost souls, the bits and pieces of them which get forgotten?”

“Yes, because we’re close to the Shadow Forest.” Damian had taken a deep breath. They were so close to a Door. One could open, he was sure of it. Gabrielle’s will was strong enough to slice one in the very air.

Waiting for Rebirth

It’s QueerBlogWed! Being his own unique vessel of queerness, Christopher returns to us in the next part of ‘Waiting for Rebirth’…

“Are you all right?” I asked, as I moved towards him. What a stupid question. Of course he wasn’t all right.
Damian raised his head at the sound of my voice. He released himself from his tight embrace, some of the heartbreak departing from his face.

“I’ll be better in a moment,” he said, taking a long, shuddering breath. “It’s not like I’m not used to this.” He let out a low, hushed laugh. “I’m not entirely sure what I was hoping to do, or prove.”

His vulnerability drew me closer, exciting a hunger I’d thought I’d never feel again. My Damian. My creator. I couldn’t exist without him. Why wasn’t he happy? What was he expecting?

I touched his hand, feeling him shiver. An image shuddered through my own brain of angry, frustrated helplessness.

“Why are you here?” Damian demanded. Young and impatient, confined in starched leather, he’d looked up at the beautiful, golden creature who stalked his aunt’s halls. Tear drops hung from Duessa’s ceiling, male teardrops. Boys who dared to be men, who were cocoon in the Lady Ashelocke’s web. She’d share them with other ladies, draining a little at a time, until all the violence and vitality was sapped from them.

This was what males were, sustenance. Sustenance for a lady, smiling slyly through the red lips and fanged teeth. This was all Damian thought there was sustenance or being a lady, until he saw her.

Straight and tall, her golden hair fell freely from any ornament or confinement. She’d laughed the deep, full bellied laugh of a man, or what Damian dreamed it would be like. Rich with unabashed joy. She did this, while fluttering her eyelashes like Duessa might have.

“Quite the place you live in,” she’d said, winking at him. Her complete lack of fear had made his shoulders relax, draining away his own shyness. “Must be frustrating.”

Yes, it had been. Frightening, but every shivering merchant, tenant, and artist who lived in the arachnocratic lands feared the Ashelockes. Damian himself grew up, shivering at the rustle of his aunt’s skirts across her marble floor.
There had been another word for his situation. Damian Ashelocke didn’t understand it, until Gabrielle herself uttered it, giving it voice. Frustrating.

She had understood. She’d seen his frustration, before Damian realized what it was.

Perhaps this was why he’d chosen to follow her, to leave Duessa’s marble halls to wander the world at Gabrielle’s side.

Only she hadn’t chosen to wander the world. She opened a shop in a small village, a shop filled with objects which weren’t what they seemed.